I'm not ready to say goodbye to September. She ends soon, you know. Just a couple more days and life will morph into October. But I'm ready for October. I'm ready for the colder weather he brings, the way he seduces the clouds into breaking their silence, the way he covers this colorless southern California earth into a deeper shade of grey and how the only real color we see is the orange of the pumpkins on the vines or in their respected boxes at the grocery store. Southern California lacks the feisty personality of fall and I suppose that if I never experienced her outside of this dreariness, I would place myself in a tanning booth along with the rest of these morbid and thankless southern Californians.

October means wearing my brown and black leggings underneath mini skirts and scarves that my mom made for me wrapped around my neck. Oh, how I missed you too. October means its ok to be cliche: go ahead and indulge yourself in a good book while you sit next to the warmth of a fire...you dont need a stone hearth either. October means many things. It means rain and frizzy curls...it means watching the "smoke" in the air while you breathe and smile up at the one you love. October means boots and thick socks and naturally rosy cheeks.

It means a one year anniversary.

It means commitment and realizing that you're starting to understand what that word truly means.

Usually in October, the Bears are settling in for their winter slumber...they're wrapping themselves in extra thick fur and are whispering sweet nothings in their sweetheart Bear's ear so that they'll dream sweetly while they're apart.

October means love "recalled to life." It is rugged and overcast but if you catch the subtleties of it's beauty, it will leave you breathless. Watch for the whisper of color while the leaves turn, listen to the silence of clouds rolling by, feel the sensuousness of the rain as it kisses your fingers. Watch the blotches of orange grow larger as the diameter of the pumpkin increases. These are beautiful things! "Seek, and you will find."

October helps me to envision my mom in her kitchen, making soups and stews and homemade bread and becoming excited about fallen leaves on the side of the road. My mom is a bohemian at heart. She loves fall...perhaps she is the one who taught me to love it as well. In fact, every memory that has led me to fall in love with fall has to do with her...she taught me to appreciate it, to savor that sweet something that comes from ironing leaves and shreded crayons onto wax paper. Looking back, I don't think I would have come to love it on my own. She instilled in me certain values about fall, to appreciate the little things that makes fall so majestic. Such as tiny pumpkins placed around the house...the smell of cinnamon sticks boiling on top of the wood stove. Without letting me know it directly, she implanted certain devices to trigger my senses and my thoughts...such a sly one she is.

Well...
I must be on my way...
September is waiting for our final goodbye and I must meet her...